


in the morning you'll dance with all the headache

by bluesterek



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bipolar Disorder, Childhood Friends, Drunk Isak Valtersen, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff, M/M, Oblivious Even, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-08-28
Packaged: 2018-12-01 20:26:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11494113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesterek/pseuds/bluesterek
Summary: “Why do you hate me? Is it still about that kiss in first grade?”“You kissed my crush in front of me, Even.”“Yeah well, sorry about that, but that was like a century ago. Besides, you don’t even like girls.”“Excuse me, what?”.or.Isak hates Even. Even hates Isak. But fortunately, Sana is going to make everything work.





	1. we pretend that we just don't care, but we care.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello hi I'm Chloé and this is the first evak story I write I hope you'll like it. Aslo I'm French, I know I make mistakes and I know this isn't "grande littérature" as french people would say, but I tried my best I swear please be kind :(   
> You can let me know if there are any mistake or grammatical error, I'll correct them, and let me know what you think. I have finished the whole story (it's only 6 chapters) so I guess I'll just update every week  
> The title of the fic, and all of the chapters' titles are from Lorde's song Sober :)

You could say Isak and Even hated each other since kindergarten. Well no, that’s not actually true, they used to be friends when they were little, but then they grew up, they had a crush on the same girl, and yeah, it didn’t end well. Even kissed the girl, Isak found out and got mad, and they never spoke to each other again unless it was to throw insults at the other.

It was very childish, they both knew that, and their friends tried to get them to talk it out a hundred time, but Isak refused to be near Even.

Isak was turning 17 this month and Even was 19 now, they should be over it, but when Isak would see Even in the hallways he couldn’t help but shoot daggers at him. Even wasn’t even sure why Isak is mad at him anymore, but he was and it kind of broke his heart but he would never admit it.

Today was the day he was going to confront Isak about it, and ask for truce, Even thought when he walked in his first class of the morning. They had to put an end to this childish fight. And if Isak wasn’t going to make the first move, Even will.

“Hi Sana”, Even said, taking seat beside his friend who was focused on her phone, but she looked up and smiled warmly when she saw him. “Hey there, still confronting Isak after lunch?”

Even had told her his plan last night, he was going to wait for Isak in front of his biology class and then he’ll take him to some place quiet and they’ll talk. Yeah, it wasn’t the best plan, but he didn’t know how to do it. For all he knew Isak would just run away when he'll see Even waiting for him and expecting to talk, but he wouldn't know until he tried.

“Yep. I’m telling you, after we talk we’re going to be best friends again. Just like we were when we were kids. We’re going to be inseparable and then I’ll ditch you because I won’t need you anymore.”

Sana smiled and God, she never smiled because she didn’t want people to know she had feelings but honestly how can you not smile when Even Bech Næsheim is there, next to you, being his extra self and talking way too fast with way too much enthusiasm. “Sounds cool, I’ll finally get rid of you. Don’t screw up and scrawl back to me though.”

“Thanks Sana for your advice, I’ll be sure to use it. Oh wait, what was your advice again? There was none. ‘Cause you’re a bad friend and you just want to get rid of me so you can spy on Yousef without having me around.”

Even waited for Sana’s reaction but she didn’t catch up right away, she still had a bright smile on her face. “You’re welcome Even, I’m always-- wait what?”

Her smile wasn’t there anymore, she had a straight face but Even could tell she wasn’t mad, she never got mad at him except for this time when he stole her cookie at the cafeteria and put the blame on Isak, but other than that he knew he was probably her favorite person in the world right after her mom, and well, maybe Yousef, now.

He honestly tried several times to talk to her about her possibly crush, but he never knew how to do it without scaring her away and having to literally run after her to get his answers.

“What? You thought I didn’t see how you’re always looking for him after school and how you--” 

Sana put a finger on her mouth to shut him up, mostly because the teacher just walked into the class and the lecture was about to start, but also because she didn’t want to talk about  _him_. Him as in Yousef. Sana never talk about her feelings and Even understood that because he never talk about his own either, but he hoped Sana knew she could tell him anything. 

“Come on Sana, you know you’ll have to tell me at some point.” Even whispered even though it was clear that Sana was ignoring him from now on. 

“No. Nope. Not happening. Not now, not ever,” was all she said before the teacher began the lecture, and their conversation fell silent. It’s okay, Even thought, she’ll talk about it when she feels like it. Which most likely means never, but that’s okay too.

***

At lunch, Sana ditched him to go sit with Vilde, Eva, Chris and Noora, which was expected since she was ignoring him, so Even went to sit with Mikael, Jakob and Martin. They were talking about girls, they’re always talking about girls, but Even wasn’t interested in talking about girls right now so he scanned the cafeteria with his eyes until they stopped on him. Isak was sitting a few tables away with his group of friends. He had his snapback on, -when doesn’t he have a snapback on, honestly?- he was smiling and Even enjoyed the view because Isak never smiles when he knows Even is around. That's a shame.

He thought about his plan, if we can call it that, and hoped it will work because he really thought they could be great friends. They were friends before, they just part ways because of a stupid kiss that wasn’t even worth it.

“So, Even, what did you do to Sana that made her so pissed at you that her gaze could kill you?” Martin interrupted his thoughts and the three of them were now looking at him.

“I told her I only hung out with her so I could spend time with Noora.” He said, joking, but Jakob’s eyes suddenly widened and his eyebrows were now furrowed.

“You like Noora?” He asked.

“No, dude, that was a joke!”

“Well do you like anyone else? You never talk about those kind of things.”

“Bro I’m a guy, I don’t have ‘crushes’, and even if I had I wouldn’t talk about it.” Even shrugs.

“Are you even interested in girls?”

There it was. His friends knew he liked both girls and boys, but he never really showed interest in girls, except with Sonja but they broke up a year ago, so they just assumed he was gay. Which makes no sense.

“No, I prefer dogs, they’re way more fun and way less problematic. Anyway, see you guys, I have to go to class.” He said, tired of getting those questions.

Even stood up, leaving his friends speechless, and walked through the cafeteria to get to his English class. He walked past Sana, who sent him a smile, letting him know that she wasn’t really mad, but she would kill him if he ever talked about Yousef again, and he also walked past Isak, who looked at him during the whole thing but there was no smile to be seen on his face. Only hatred. 

***

His English class was over, and it was now time to put his plan into action. He honestly had no idea what he was going to tell Isak once he'll be in front of him, but he'll figure it out. Even walked quickly through the hallways, knowing Isak would get out at any minute now. Fortunately he was fast enough to get to the door just when the students were starting to leave the room. Almost everyone was out now, and Even could see Isak slowly packing his stuff while talking to Jonas and Madhi. Maybe Even shouldn’t have listened to what they were saying, but he did.

“I hate him so much, like I can’t even stand being in the same room as him anymore, he annoys me like no one ever did before ugh.” He heard Isak say.

“Are we still talking about Even?” Said a voice, which Even assumed belonged to Madhi.

“Of course, who else.”

“No but seriously guys, you don’t understand, he’s always around me, as if he wanted to talk to me and be friends with me, can you believe it?”

Even wanted to interrupt them and tell Isak that they once were actually friends, until he decided to cut him off, but he stayed hidden and didn't say anything. He just wanted to hear what else Isak had to say about him, even if it meant hurting his ego.

“Can you believe it Madhi? Someone wants to be friends with Isak. Crazy.” Jonas joked.

“Stop making fun of me. You know why this is unbelievable. And even if I didn’t hate him, I would still do because his face annoys me and his smile annoys me and his laugh annoys me and his hair annoys me and oh god I just want to throw him under a bus.” 

Even didn’t want to hear more, so he just left, trying to convince himself that he wasn’t hurt.  

* * *

  **Sana**

(15:28) So?

So, so what? I’m still a rockstar I got my rock moves (15:32)

and I don’t need youuu gess what(15:32)

(15:32) Even.

What, you don’t like P!nk? (15:32)

(15:33) Did you talk to Isak?

Ohhh (15:33)

Um (15:33)

No? (15:33)

(15:34) Even!!! Oh my god I knew I wouldn’t get rid of you so easily.

(15:34) No but seriously, why not?

Cause he’s an asshole who talks shit behind my back and I don’t ever want to hear about him. (15:34)

(15:39) Even pick up your phone.

(15:54) Even? 

* * *

Of course she would come to his house, what did he expect? Even opened the front door and let Sana in because he wasn’t really in the mood to fight or to mess around with her. Even walked to the kitchen without any enthusiasm, and they sat face to face, without saying a word for a while. He knew his mom would come home from work soon, so maybe if he let the silence linger a little while longer he wouldn’t have to explain himself to Sana. But Sana being Sana, she started asking questions right away. And honestly he didn't want to talk about Isak, he just wanted to sleep. He didn't tell her that, otherwise she would think he's having an episode when he's clearly just annoyed by Isak being an asshole. 

“Sooo, I see you’re not in the mood for bad jokes, that’s a first. Tell me what he said and I’ll punch him next time I see him.” She said. 

“You will?” Even asked, even though he knew she wouldn't. 

“No, Even, I won’t. He’s my friend, I won’t hurt him, I’ll just talk sense to him.” Sana said, as he expected. 

Even shrugged. “He won’t listen, he’s an asshole who doesn’t care about anything but himself.” 

“Stop saying he’s an asshole. What did he say?” 

“He said that he hated me and he never wants to talk to me again because I’m annoying and… yeah he was repeating himself but," Even tilted his head, trying to remember, "oh, he said he wanted to throw me under a bus.” 

“That’s not very kind.” Sana said, furrowing her brows. 

“Told ya.” 

“Did he say that to your face?” 

Even shook his head. “Nah, he was talking to Jonas and Madhi, but I was waiting in front of his classroom to apologize but I heard that so yeah, I left.” 

“Mh. I’ll talk to him tomorrow, but I’m not gonna let you guys hate each other till you’re both old and bald. Not gonna happen.” She tells him. 

“Why do you like him? Like, if you hang out with someone as fun and cool and hot as me, how can you be friends with someone like him?” Even asked, half joking. 

Sana furrowed her eyebrows and smiled a little. “You don’t know him like I don’t. Actually, you don’t know him at all. He’s really kind and cool, he’s adorable and wouldn’t hurt a fly, really. Well he would hurt an Even, but he would have reasons to do that.” 

Even scoffed. “You know, if I wasn’t aware of your crush on Yousef I would think you like Isak.” 

“Talk about him one more time and I’ll punch you.” 

Even threw his hands in the air. “Why does everyone hate me?” 

“Who hates you baby? Are you in trouble? Did you get in a fight?” There she was. His mom. Even adores him mom, she’s everything to him. But she’s kind of a drama queen sometimes. Like mother like son, I guess. 

“Oh hi Sana! How are you?” His mom really likes Sana, she’s almost part of the family now, and his mom probably likes her more than him but that’s okay.  

“I’m good, thanks Mrs. Bech Næsheim. I was just leaving, Even needs to study for his test on Friday, he’s not doing so well in English.” 

“He’s not? Even! Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Oh God he’s going to kill Sana. Not now, though, because she left before he could say anything else. He managed to escape to his mom’s questions and went to his room, thinking about nothing else than a small boy with blond hair and blue eyes always wearing snapbacks.

Even never really understood why Isak stopped talking to him. Well he kissed her crush so there's that, but they were great friends, even their parents were getting on just fine, he didn't think doing this one mistake would mean losing his best friend. Maybe he's just not worth being someone best friend. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can find me on twitter @bluesterek


	2. night, midnight, lose my mind.

Even didn’t want to leave his bed, because he knew he would have to take the tram and certainly run into Isak, and he really wanted to avoid that. The conversation he overheard had hurt him much more than he’d like to admit. He just wanted to apologize, but Isak just wanted to throw him under a bus so it was a bit complicated.

“Even, you have to get up or else you’re going to be late!” Her mom shouted from the kitchen, where she seemed to be making pancakes. Even loved pancakes. But he wasn’t hungry. He got dressed, did magic with his hair, brushed his teeth, and five minutes later he was in the kitchen, ready to go to school.

“Aren’t you going to eat?" His mother asked. "You still have ten minutes.”

“Nah I want to be early at school, I’ll eat more at lunch,” he tells her.

“But I made pancakes!” She said, pretending to be hurt.

“Sorry Mama, see you tonight!”

Even left the house hearing his mom shout a ‘have a good day baby, love you’, and he walked as fast as he could to the tram stop. He really wanted to avoid Isak, so for the first time of the year, -or of his life, honestly- he was going to be early at school. Except luck wasn’t on his side today, and when Even jumped in the tram and saw a familiar blond boy with a snapback leaned on the door a few feet away, he considered running away and waiting for another tramway. But it was too late, the doors were closed, and Isak was looking at him. And not in a nice way. He never looked at him in a nice way.

Even sighed and turned himself around so he couldn’t see Isak anymore. Why did he have to take _this_ tram? Isak was never early, if anything, he was almost always late. More than Even. That’s saying something. He felt Isak’s gaze on him and he didn’t know what to do so he turned around again and looked at him in the eyes. Isak raised an eyebrow but held his gaze until the tram stopped in front of their school. He walked past Even quickly, almost making him fall, and Even wanted to punch him so bad but he didn’t do anything because Sana would kill him.

Speaking of Sana, she was waiting for him in front of their classroom. She was talking to Vilde and Even smiled when he saw her. He really liked Vilde. She was so cute and so intelligent and so friendly, and always enthusiastic, he didn’t understand how one could ever hate her. “Hi Even!!!” She said when she saw him as well.

“Hey Vilde, I love your hair you look so cute!” She had two high buns on each side of the head and had gold glitter in between them.

“Thank you!” Vilde was smiling wider than before, if that’s even possible, and Sana was watching the two of them with a smile on her face as well. “I have to go, I see you later Sana. Bye Even!”

He watched her run after Eva and Noora and then he looked back at Sana, she was frowning but she was still smiling.

“What?”

Sana rolled her eyes. “Are you going to steal my friends now? I can’t believe this, why does everyone like you?”

“Well at least I’m certainly not going to steal Isak from you,” Even said.

“Oh yeah about that, I talked to him last night. He wants to kill you in your sleep but that’s okay because I have a plan!” She said excitedly almost as if it was the best news of the week.

“You do?”

She smiled softly. “Of course I do.”

“Well, tell me then.”

“Nope, time to go to class.”

Even pouted but Sana just stuck her tongue out and entered the classroom. Even followed her and sat down next to her even though he knew she wouldn’t talk to him during the course. He just sat there in silence, half listening to the teacher, and hoping Sana’s plan would be better than his.

***

Her plan wasn’t better than his. If anything, it was worse.

“I’m not going to a party at _his_ place, Sana,” Even groaned.

“Oh yes you are. I’ll drag you if I have to, but you’re going to this party, and you’re going to talk to him,” Sana said, not even looking at him.

“He won’t let me in anyway. As soon as he’ll see my face he’ll slam the door on me.”

Sana rolled her eyes and shook her head. “He won’t slam the door on you because he won’t be the one opening it. Noora is throwing the party, but he’ll be there, I made sure of it. Now go away and let me study.”

Even raised his eyebrows but obeyed and left Sana on her own. He couldn’t believe her. She was forcing him to go to a party at _her_ friend’s place, which is also his _worst_ enemy’s place. Yeah, he decided that Isak was his worst enemy from now on. Two can play that game.

Even was wandering in the halls, lost in his thoughts, when he bumped into someone, hard enough to make them both fall to the ground. He was about to apologize and help the other person out but when he saw who it was, he got up and smirked. “Hello Valtersen. Can’t stand on your feet?”

“Oh shut up, you dumbass,” Isak said, pointing his middle finger at him. He got up as well and gathered his stuff that had fallen along with him before walking away without looking back.

“Oh my god, Even, why did you do to him?” Even rolled his eyes when he heard his best friend's voice and turned around to face him. Mikael seemed mad at him. Why was everyone mad at him? Why were all his friends defending Isak? Just-- Why?

Even rolled his eyes. “Nothing I swear! Well, I ran into him and made him fall but that wasn’t my intention! Why are you all on his side?”

“Because Isak is cooler than you,” Mikael replied, as if it was obvious.

“Wow, thanks man. I thought we were best friends.” Even said, a hand on his heart, pretending to be hurt.

“We are. But Isak is really cool, I don’t understand why you hate him.” Mikael said, looking at his phone, half listening to him.

“Because he wants to throw me under a bus.”

Mikael looked up from his phone and sighed. “This is literally your only argument. I want to throw you under a bus too, yet you don’t hate me.”

Even only shrugged at that because he knew his best friend was right. He only hated Isak because Isak hated him. And Isak only hated him for something he did seven years ago. Their fight was really childish and stupid, he knew that. But what could he do? If Isak wanted to be stubborn, that was on him.

The halls began to fill with students as the bell rang, and Even and Mikael practically ran to the cafeteria before it was too crowded. They sat down at their usual spot and began to eat, knowing Martin and Jakob were still in class.

“So, I guess Sana invited you to Noora’s party this Friday?” Mikael asked.

Even raised his eyebrows. “ _Invited_ me?" He said loudly, "no, she’s _forcing me_ to go. She said Isak will be there, she wants us to talk.”

Mikael smirked at that. “Ooooh shit’s about to go down.”

“You’re gonna be there right?” Even asked. He didn't want to find himself alone in the middle of Isak's living room. He knew Sana would be there but she would probably prefer hang out with her friends rather than him.

“Of course, wouldn’t want to miss that. I’ve been waiting for you two to beat each other up for like a hundred years. I wonder who’s gonna be the one ending up in the hospital. Probably Isak, you’re way taller than him.”

“Nobody’s gonna end up in the hospital, Mikael,” Even said, hoping he was right.

“Oh, I wouldn’t be so sure.”

***

Nobody ended up in the hospital, but shit did went down, that’s for sure.

When Even went home after last period on Friday, he was a little down because he thought he failed his English exam, and he knew that if it was the case his mom would be disappointed. He didn’t have time to think about that, though, because Mikael was waiting for him in the kitchen. He quickly changed into a white shirt and black Jeans and five minutes later they were in front of the Kollektiv.

They could hear the loud banging coming from inside the apartment and Even was eager to get drunk and forget about this tiring past week. Just as he was about to knock, the door swung open, Vilde standing behind it with a wide smile and wide arms. She seemed happy to see Even, and Even was really happy to see her as well. He just liked being around her, she was such an enthusiast girl even though he knew she had some things going on her side. Even hugged her, Mikael did the same, and Vilde let them in, closing the door behind them.

“I’m glad you came! I wasn’t sure you would, you know, since _Isak_ is there too." She said Isak's name quietly, as if he was like Voldemort or whatever. "Anyway, Sana was looking for you but I don’t know where she went.”

“I’ll find her, thanks, Vilde,” Even told her and she disappeared in the crowd.

Mikael elbowed him. “Go find her, I’ll wait for Martin and Jakob, they’re going to be late. Oh and, if you and Valtersen get in a fight, call me, I don’t wanna miss that.”

Even rolled his eyes and made his way through the numerous teens dancing on a Justin Bieber song, searching for Sana. He found her in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and listening attentively to Noora. When they noticed him they shared a knowing look and Noora left the kitchen with a smirk on her face.

“What was that?” Even asked as Sana tried to hide her smile.

“Nothing. But heeey you came!” She said.

Even scoffed. “Of course I came. You would’ve killed me if I didn’t.”

“Hm true. So did you see Isak yet?” Sana asked.

Even shook his head. “Nope, and I don’t want to.”

“I saw him earlier, you should talk to him before he’s drunk if you wanna have a deep conversation though,” Sana said, pushing him toward the living room where everyone was dancing and talking and singing and drinking.

“I don’t wanna have a deep conversation with him, and I don’t see him anywhere anyway so I’m gonna go to the bathroom, am I allowed to do that?”

“Sure.” She had now the same smirk Noora had five minutes ago and he didn’t know what it meant, but honestly he didn’t want to know. He left Sana’s side and made his way to the bathroom only to find it occupied. He leaned against the wall and pulled out his phone. His mom had sent him a text earlier in the evening, asking if he was going back home after the party. Even was about to answer, when the bathroom door opened and revealed Isak. Of fucking course. Who else. Even allowed himself to take him in. He looked good, really. A white shirt, blue Jeans, his hair seemed fluffy since he wasn’t wearing a snapback. He had a smile on his face but it fell as soon as he saw Even in front of him.

“What are you doing here?” Isak asked harshly.

“Chill. I just need to pee,” Even said, calmly.

Isak shook his head. “No, I mean, what are you doing _here_ , in my apartment.”

“Well, it’s Noora’s party, and she invited me,” Even said, stating the obvious.

“Great. When are you leaving?” Isak seemed really annoyed, he was looking over Even's shoulder and it was like he wanted to run away. Honestly Even was surprised he hadn't already.

Even rolled his eyes. “Isak.”

Isak mimicked him and rolled his eyes as well. “Even.”

Even sighed. This boy was so stubborn. “Why do you hate me?”

“You know why.” Isak crossed his arms on his chest.

“Ugh honestly I’m not sure anymore. Is it still about that kiss in first grade?” Even considered the idea that maybe, just maybe, Even did something else to piss Isak off, but apart from breathing and existing, he didn't really know what he could have done.

“You kissed _my_ crush in front of me, Even,” Isak said, confirming the fact that it was still about that.

“Yeah well, sorry about that, but that was like a century ago. Besides, you don’t even like girls.”

Isak gaped at him. “Excuse me, _what_?” Isak was angry -as always when he was around Even. His cheeks were red and he looked like he was going to kill him but Even didn’t pay attention to that.

Even raised an eyebrow. “What? Do you?”

“Are you being serious right now?”

“I am, are you? Wait… you’re not gay? Like, you like vaginas and boobs and stuff?”

“I swear to God Even if you say one more word I’ll punch you.”

“Okay but that didn’t answer my question. You’re straight???”

He punched him. Isak fucking _punched_ him. His fist landing harshly enough on his nose to make it crack. Exactly like he did three years ago. Even looked at Isak, taken aback, eyes wide open and nose bleeding, and Isak looked back at him with a mix of a smile and a smirk. He was proud of what he did. Even rolled his eyes -he seemed to do that a lot lately- and raised his hand to his nose to stop it from bleeding on the floor.

“Of course I’m straight, you asshole,” Isak said before walking away and leaving Even as speechless as he was two minutes ago. He had warned him, but Even didn’t think Isak would actually punch him. _What the fuck._

Even went in the bathroom, wiped his nose with toilet paper and kept it pressed against it, hoping his nose wasn’t broken. He made his way back to the kitchen, Sana was still there, alone, and her smile fell as soon as she noticed the blood.

“Oh my God Even, are you okay? What happened?” She came closer and took a look at his nose. It wasn't that bad, Even just loved to be a drama queen.

Even shrugged. “Yeah, just usual stuff you know, Isak hating me.”

“Mh, I guess my plan didn’t work then.” Even furrowed his eyebrows and Sana looked at her feet in guilt.

“Your plan? You knew he was in the bathroom? You knew we were going to bump into each other. Damn it Sana! I got punched because of you!”

Sana crossed her arms on her chest. “No, you got punched because you’re stupid. What did you say to him?”

Even stayed silent, his eyes landing on everything but Sana. Which made her both worried and angry.

“Even?” She gave him a look. At look that said everything.

“Um… I might have implied that he was gay…?" Even said, looking at his feet. "To my defense I really thought he was.”

Sana stayed silent for a minute. But then she sighed. “You know it wouldn’t be a problem if he was, right?”

“Of course I know! That’s why I don’t understand why he punched me when he could’ve just denied it,” Even said.

“You have to apologize, Even. Not right now though because he’s probably really pissed at you.”

Even couldn't believe her. There was no way he was going to apologize to Isak. He would punch him before Even even has time to say a word. “ _I_ have to apologize? _He_ punched me!”

Sana shook her head. “Oh my God, you really have no idea, do you?”

“What? Why do you always seem to know more than everyone?”

“Because I do.”

***

It was later during the evening, everyone was pretty wasted by now, including Isak, who was dancing in the middle of the living room and singing like there wasn’t half of the school watching him. Excluding Even, who was watching Isak from his spot on the couch, between two girls who were deliberately flirting with him but Even didn’t care, he was focused on Isak.

Sana was right, he had to apologize. The thing is, he didn’t know how to approach him without having his fist meet his nose for the second time. He didn’t have time to think of a plan because when the two girls got tired of Even not flirting back with her, they left and Isak immediately stopped dancing and took place beside him on the couch.

Even furrowed his eyebrows, trying to understand if Isak wanted him to leave or if he wanted to talk to him, but he stopped thinking when Isak began talking.

“Sorry about your nose.”

Even smirked. Only a little because he didn't want Isak to hit him again. “Wow, did you just apologized to me?”

“Shut up, I just feel bad because your nose didn’t do anything to me, you did.” Isak said.

His words were slow and his sentences weren’t coherent, but that’s what alcohol do to your body. Even wished he had drunk a little more, enough to gave him the courage to say what he was about to say.

“I’m sorry for saying that you were gay, that wasn’t kind of me. I mean, if you were gay that wouldn’t be an issue, I hope you know that, but if you’re not I’m sorry for assuming that you were.”

“Why did you think I was?” Isak asked, genuinely intrigued.

Even shrugged. “I don’t know, I’ve never seen you with a girl. Apart from Sara but it didn't last long.”

“I’ve never seen you with a girl either.” Isak said. "Apart from Sonja."

“Never said I wasn’t gay.”

Isak raised his eyebrows and was about to say something but suddenly his face was pale and he was running to the bathroom. Even ran after him, wondering what was wrong with him, only to see him throwing up in the toilet. When he seemed to have thrown up everything he had swallowed earlier, he let himself fall onto the ground, eyes falling in tiredness.

“Let me help you.”

“I don’t need your help, Even,” Isak mumbled, struggling to keep his eyes open.

Even sighed. This kid is so stubborn. “We’ll fight later, just let me help you.”

Isak gave up and let Even lift him up from the ground. Even carried him to his room, opening the door with his foot, and carefully laid him on the bed, pulling the cover up. Ten seconds later Isak was sleeping, his face buried deep in his pillow, and Even wondered if he should go or stay. He didn’t want to go back to the living room where everyone was drunk and dancing to shit music, so he decided to stay with Isak. Even kicked his shoes and laid down on his back on the cover beside Isak, looking at the ceiling, thinking about what he would say when Isak would wake up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo that was chapter 2, thank you guys for the kudos and the comments, I really appreciate it :) it's always nice to know what people think about your work yknow okay anyways I hope you liked it, let me know what you think ziefsbidubx see you next week!
> 
> you can find me on twitter @bluesterek


	3. i'm clean out of air in my lungs.

Even didn’t mean to fall asleep, but he was tired and Isak’s bed was comfortable so when he woke up and saw that the sun was already up, he wasn’t so surprised. Isak was still asleep beside him, but he had turned into his sleep and was now on his side, face to face with Even.

Even looked intensively at him and took every inch of his face in. Isak looked so peaceful, he even had a small smile on his face and it almost broke Even’s heart knowing it would disappear as soon as Isak would wake up and see him.

He didn't know why he was still there, he should have gone home when everyone did, he should have just laid Isak on his bed and leave. But he fell asleep and now Even could hear Isak's roommate in the kitchen, and he didn't dare to leave the room because it would look like he was doing the walk of shame. Which was clearly not what Even was doing. He just wanted to go home before Isak woke up and decided to kill him, but it was too late now.

His phone vibrated in his pocket and he took it out only to see he had _a lot_ of texts from Mikael and a text from his mom asking if he was okay. He forgot to reply to her earlier, so he told her he was okay and will come home soon. He then read all the texts Mikael had sent him.

* * *

**Mikael**

(02:04) Bro, where are u?

(02:04) Did you leave without me?

(02:15) I heard you got in a fight with Isak, I told you to call me if it happened!!!

(03:56) Even?

(04:27) Send me an exclamation point if ur alive

! (10:30)

(10:30) Dude!

(10:30) I texted you that like a year ago

(10:30) What happened?

(10:30) r u okay?

I’m fine, I’m still at Isak’s (10:31)

(10:31) wtf? I looked everywhere for you

yeah uh I’m in his bedroom…? (10:31)

(10:31) Oooh?

(10:32) Oooooh!

(10:32) So you guys are good now?

(10:32) Is he good in bed?

(10:32) I heard hate sex was the best

Wtf Mikael?! (10:32)

He was pretty wasted I helped him up to his room because he could barely stand on his feet (10:33)

We didn’t have sex or whatever you creep I’m waiting  (10:33)

for him to wake up so we can talk properly (10:33)

(10:33) Hm. If you say so

Bye Mikael. (10:34)

* * *

The bed shifted beside him and Even turned his head and froze. Isak was awake. And his small smile was gone. “What the fuck are you doing in my bed?”

Even forced a smile. “Good morning to you too, did you sleep well? I know I did, your bed is pretty comfortable.”

“Why didn’t you go home like everyone else?” Isak asked in exasperation.

“Because I fell asleep after putting you in bed. I swear I didn’t mean to. Besides, we need to talk,” Even said.

Isak didn’t say anything, he just buried his face in his pillow and sighed. He was too hung-over to have a real conversation right now but he knew that Even wouldn’t give up.

“What do you want?” What did he want? Honestly, he didn’t know anymore.

Even shrugged. “I’m tired of this. Us hating each other.”

“You hate me? Why? I mean, apart from the fact that I broke your nose.” Isak chuckled softly and took a look at Even's nose, which was probably fine since Even didn't feel any pain.

“Well I never really hated you until this week. I heard you talking shit behind my back when I was waiting at the door to make truce with you. You were making fun of me with Jonas and Madhi."

Isak scoffed. “Ow, sorry, did I hurt your feelings?”

“Nah, I don’t care about what you think anymore.”

Isak squinted. “Cool. So are we done here?”

“Are you kidding? We didn’t solve the problem. Come on, get dressed, take a shower or whatever, and I’m gonna make you breakfast, then we’ll talk,” Even said, getting out of the bed.

Isak furrowed his eyebrows and was about to say something but Even had already left the bedroom and was heading to the kitchen.

“Um, hi?” said a voice behind him. Even turned around and was meet by a tall guy. He guessed it was Eskild, Isak’s roommate that Vilde wouldn’t shut up about.

“Hi! Eskild, right? I’m Even,” Even said, offering his hand to the tall ginger guy standing in front of him.

“Even, uh? I heard a lot about you," Eskild said before shaking his hand. "Listen, I’m not going to ask what you’re doing here, but I’m going to tell you something. You seem cool and damn you’re really hot, but I swear if you hurt my little baby again I’ll have to cut your balls, got it?”

Even wasn’t even surprised that Eskild knew him, Isak probably talk about him everyday claiming how much he hates him. He nodded at Eskild and the boy cracked a smile.

“Great. Noora is at Eva’s, Linn is half dead in her room, and I’m going out, you basically have the place for yourselves if you want to… you know.”

Even furrowed his eyebrows and tried to understand what Eskild was implying but he couldn’t. “If we want to what?”

Eskild licked his lips and chuckled. “If you want to have sex. Anyways, it was nice to meet you.” He left the kitchen and five seconds later he left the apartment and the place fell silent.

_What the fuck._ First Mikael, now Eskild? Even shook his head and walked around the kitchen to find everything he needed to cook. When Isak stepped in the kitchen a few minutes later, Even was leaning against the counter, eyes focused on his phone. There was a plate full of pancakes on the table and it took him a few seconds to get that Even cooked for him.

“When you said you were making breakfast I thought you meant cereal and milk.”

“Oh.” Even looked up from his phone and laid his eyes on the boy standing a few feet from him. ”You don’t like pancakes?”

“I do, actually. You didn’t have to, but thanks I guess.” He smiled a little. He fucking smiled and Even thought it was the best thing he’s ever seen. He smiled back and they looked at each other for what seemed like an eternity until Isak sat down and began to eat.

“I met Eskild,” said Even, sitting in front of Isak and studying his face. “He’s a cool guy.”

“Did he say something to you?” Isak asked, curious.

Even scoffed. “Yeah, he said we had the apartment to ourselves if we wanted to have sex.”

Isak choked on the food and began to cough, trying to breathe. His cheeks were flushed but Even assumed it was because he was dying.

“It’s funny because Mikael said the same thing,” Even continues, “He told me hate sex was the best.”

“I bet.” Isak’s cheeks were still a bit pink and he looked so cute. “ _Anyways_ , your pancakes are really good.”

Even grinned. “Thanks. It was kind of my way to say sorry for everything, y’know. Did it work?”

Isak didn’t say anything and he didn’t look up either but Even could catch what seemed to be a smile on his face and _fuck_ , he wished he had seen that smile earlier. Well, he _had_ seen that smile earlier, but it was never addressed to him.

Even sighed and looked at his hands. “I’m so sorry I kissed your crush, honestly  didn’t even know it was your crush. But it was seven years ago--”

“It’s okay Even, I'm over it. I just thought you still were an asshole but if I had talked to you earlier I would've known you're not,” Isak cut him off.

“You mean we’re good?” Even asked, smiling widely and looking intensively at Isak, who was looking shyly at his plate.

Isak shrugged and smiled back, but the smile was more likely addressed to his plate than to Even.“I guess. But don’t expect to hang out with me and my friends, and to make me pancakes every morning, and to sleep in my bed again, and to talk to me every day. All that shit.”

“Okay. Cool. That’s great! Well, Eskild cleaned the apartment before we woke up so I guess my job’s done here. I’ll see you at school.”

Even left the room and began to gather his stuff on the couch when he heard Isak calling for him from the kitchen. “Wait. Even.” Even looked back and Isak was leaned against the doorframe, hands fidgeting. “Everyone is out, well except for Linn but whatever, we have the apartment to ourselves, maybe you want to…”

Even quirked an eyebrow. “Have sex with you?”

Isak gaped at him and seemed to be searching for his words for a second. “ _What the fuck_ , Even? What I was going to say is, I don’t want to be alone, maybe you want to watch a movie with me or something?”

“Oh.” Even chuckled and melted at the sight of Isak blushing. “Yeah, why not. Okay. You just told me that I shouldn't expect to hang out with you, though.”

“Just shut up and go find a movie you want to watch, my laptop is under my bed. I’ll clean this up while you do that,” Isak said, mentioning the mess Even had made in the kitchen.

Even raised an eyebrow but he nodded and headed to bedroom, he thought about what movie they could watch, and when Isak came back Even was comfortably settled in the bed, and the movie was ready to be played. Isak settled beside him and looked at his laptop between them. “So, what are we watching?”

Even smiled widely. “Romeo and Juliet. You might want to get tissues.”

“You made me watch it when we were kids, I’m not gonna cry, Even, I’m a big boy,” Isak said.

“If you say so,” said Even, rolling his eyes. He clicked on the screen and the movie started.

At first they were very silent, they were focused on the screen, commenting a bit when something interesting happened. Then Even lost interest in the movie since he saw it approximately a hundred and twenty three times, and decided to focus his gaze on Isak instead. He was so deep in the movie that he didn’t notice Even was staring at him. He smiled fondly when Isak looked frustrated because of all the misunderstandings, he smiled fondly when Isak looked angry because of a fight, he smiled fondly when Isak looked happy because of a cute scene between the two lovers. He just smiled fondly.

***

The credits were now playing, and Isak was crying but he hid his face in his pillow because he didn’t want Even to see.

Even patted his shoulder softly. “Told you you would need tissues.”

“I’m not crying.”

“Sure you’re not.”

“I hate you so much,” Isak said, revealing his face. His eyes were red and Even just wanted to hug him. So he did. He leaned in and wrapped his arms carefully around Isak. The boy froze.

“What are you doing?” Isak asked, trying to get away from Even's grip but it made Even tighten his grip even more.

“I’m hugging you. You need it,” Even said softly, his breath tickling Isak's ear.

“I don’t,” Isak protested.

Even shook his head in exasperation. “Yes you do, now shut up and enjoy.”

Isak finally relaxed in his arms and buried his head in Even’s shoulder. Even tighten his grip around him and buried his nose in Isak’s hair that smelled like apple because of the shower he took earlier. They’d never been so close, and Even had never felt so good. They hated each other for a decade while they could’ve just spend their time hugging, talking, laughing, watching and movies together. What a waste of time.

Even let him go and Isak wanted to stay a little while longer in his arms, why not forever, but he didn’t say anything.

“Feeling better?” Even asked.

Isak nodded shyly. "Yeah… I forgot it ended like that. It's still so unfair though.”

“Agreed. I’ll show you another Baz Luhrmann movie sometime. You should watch _The Get Down_ , it’s a show but it’s so good. But you’re gonna cry at the end too because it’s kind of sad and Netflix cancelled it so we don’t know what happen to the characters.”

Isak was watching him fondly while he talked about the show that really seemed to be great. “You know Even, I never thought I’ll ever be saying this, but you’re kinda cool.”

“Of course I am!” Even chuckled and punch Isak’s shoulder playfully. “We could’ve been great friends if you didn’t hate me for a stupid kiss.”

“Yeah. I admit it was childish. I just… I thought you were an asshole. The girl didn’t even like me. I guess you’re hotter than me,” Isak said playfully.

“Aw Isak, don’t say that. You’re hot too. Not hotter than me, of course, but you’re hot,” Even said.

Isak laughed, but his cheeks were back to being pink. “That’s not very straight of you to say.”

“I already told you I’m not straight,” Even said, laughing, and if Isak was laughing before, he wasn’t anymore. He looked up and stared at Even with wide eyes.

“What? I thought you were joking yesterday! You’re gay?”

“Naaah. I’m pansexual,” Even said with a shrug. Half of Norway knew he wasn’t fully straight, besides he was very open about his sexuality, he was a bit surprised to see that Isak didn’t know.

Isak gaped at him. “Woah. That’s cool! I had no idea.”

They talked a little more until it was noon and Even had to go home because his mom was beginning to worry. Even left the apartment with a smile on his face, and Isak watched him disappear in the street from the window with a smile on his face too.

* * *

**Sana**

Sana! (13:59)

Guess what (13:59)

You’re gonna be so proud of me (13:59)

Honestly I’m proud of myself (13:59)

(14:12) What?

(14:12) Did you finally learn the difference between a toad and a frog?

Nahhh (14:13)

I stayed at Isak’s last night because he was wasted and long story short I made him pancakes to make him forgive me for every stupid shit I did and it worked!!! Then he asked me if I wanted to stay this morning and we watched Romeo and Juliet and he cried so I hugged him cause he needed it and then he told me I was cool and I told him I was pansexual and I invited him at the party I’m throwing next Friday and he told me it was his birthday on Wednesday so I was thinking about getting him a present but I have no idea what to buy (14:13)

(14:14) So are you guys dating now?

No??? Wtf Sana? (14:14)

(14:14) Oh.

(14:14) Okay.

(14:15) Forget I ever said that.

Why tf would we be dating? (14:15)

We’re friends, that’s already a lot since he still hated me twelve hours ago (14:15)

(14:16) Sure.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go, that was chapter 3 I hope you liked it, let me know what you thought! I'm on holidays but I think I'll be able to update every week :)  
> We're halfway through the story already but be ready for next monday because a lot of things happen and yeah you'll see haha  
> You can find me on twitter @bluesterek


	4. my hips have missed your hips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (drunk!isak)

“So I heard you have a boyfriend now.”

Even spat his food and looked up at his mom with wide eyes. They were sitting at the table with his father, and they were having dinner peacefully until his mom said that. She was watching him suspiciously and he didn’t understand where this came from.

Even gaped at his mom. “What the fuck?”

“Language, young boy,” his mom said.

“I don’t have a boyfriend, Mama. Where’d you hear that?” Even asked even though he was ninety percents sure Sana was the one to blame.

His mom shook her head and laughed. “I won’t reveal my source. But it’s okay baby, I know you like boys too, you don’t have to be ashamed.”

Even gaped even more at her. “I’m not ashamed! I just don’t have a boyfriend.”

“Okay. If you say so.”

His father was now watching him suspiciously too, and he furrowed his eyebrows in frustration because he really wasn’t lying. His mother changed the subject as soon as she understood that Even wasn’t planning on talking about it and he silently thanked her for that.

After dinner Even went to his room and jumped on his bed, burying his face in his pillow. He knew his mom was talking about Isak, because who else? But Isak wasn’t his boyfriend. And he clearly didn’t understand why everyone was thinking otherwise.

Speaking of Isak, -even though he was always speaking of Isak these days- Even had finally found him a present for his birthday tomorrow, but he didn’t know if he would like it. He hoped so. It’s hard to find a present for a boy you know almost nothing about. He couldn’t remember what Isak liked when they were 7, but he was turning 17 so he probably didn’t like the same things he did ten years ago anyway.

Even took out his laptop from under the bed and chose a movie to watch. It was one he had already watched a thousand time but who cares. The thing is, he couldn’t focus on the film. He mind was somewhere else, thinking about Isak. At midnight he took out his phone and sent him a text.

* * *

**Isak**

HAPPY BIRTHDAY (00:00)

I can’t believe you’re 17 now (00:00)

You’re still so small though (00:00)

(00:00) bitch I’m 5’11

And I’m 6’4 so: you’re small (00:01)

(00:01) i’m not small you’re just a giraffe

Giraffes are cute (00:01)

(00:02) you’re cute

(00:02) did you stay awake till midnight just to wish me a happy birthday?

Of course (00:02)

I wanted to be the first (00:03)

(00:04) you’re not the first, Eskild said it before you

(00:04) he was waiting behind my door and at 23:59:59 he barged into my room and jumped onto my bed

(00:04) like dude imagine if i was jerking off???

I’d rather not (00:05)

(00:05) ;)

what does that mEAN? (00:05)

ISAK? (00:07)

(00:08) thanks for staying up just for me, you can go to bed now

(00:08) see ya tomorrow

Goodnight Isak (00:08)

(00:08) goodnight giraffe boy

* * *

They both fell asleep with a wide smile on their face and thinking about each other.

***

Even woke up a little earlier hoping he would run into Isak on the tram but he didn’t and it was okay because this meant he’d get to surprise him with his present at his locker.

When he saw him at the end of the hallway he smiled and Isak smiled as well even though he was trying to hide it. They stared at each other as Isak made his way to Even and didn’t break the eye contact when he was standing in front of him.

“Hi,” Isak said, and he didn’t expect Even to hug him in the middle of the school, in front of everyone but he did and he didn’t complain because it felt really good having his arms wrapped around him.

“Happy birthday,” Even whispered in Isak’s ear and Isak shivered but smiled in Even’s hoodie. “I have a present for you.”

“You didn’t have to buy me anything…”

Even let go of Isak and reached for the flash drive in his pocket. He handed it to Isak and smiled.

“I didn’t. All my favorite movies are on it, and I put _The Get Down_ too cause you should really watch it. It’s probably the worst present you’ll have but dude you should have told me earlier it was your birthday!”

Isak smiled. “Well it’s not the best present since Eskild got me a fucking TV, but yours is for sure the second best.”

“Ow you hurt my feelings,” Even said, putting his hand on his heart like the drama queen he is.

“No but seriously, thank you,” Isak said.

Isak’s eyes met Even’s and Isak was smiling and he had been smiling all week because of Even and it made his heart do stupid things but that’s okay.

“I have to go to class, but I’ll see you around!” Isak walked away, the flash drive still in his hand, and Even watched him until he disappeared at the corner of the hallway.

“Did I just see you two hug in the middle of the hall or was that just an hallucination?” Even turned around to face Sana and she had a smirk on her face. She always did when she was proud of something she did.

Even scratched the back of his neck. “Um yeah that was a birthday hug.”

Sana raised an eyebrow, not believing a word of it. “Sure. You two are cute it’s gross.”

“Sana, it was you who told my mom I had a boyfriend, wasn’t it?” Even asked.

“Well, I told her you had a new friend, but when she heard it was Isak she was convinced you two liked each other and since I’m convinced too I didn’t tell her that you weren’t actually dating. Yet. _Shit_ I talk too much, okay I’ll see you at lunch, bye!”

Sana was gone in a flash and Even was left speechless and seriously confused. But he didn’t really think more of it because he had to get to class.

* * *

**Isak**

You’re still coming to my party on Friday right? (12:12)

(12:12) can’t

(12:12) i have a date

Oh (12:14)

Okay. (12:14)

(12:14) reuirzgorg

(12:14) dude

(12:14) that was a joke

Not funny. (12:15)

(12:15) oh come ooon

(12:15) i’m sorry

(12:15) of course i’m coming

(12:16) in more than one way ;)

wHAT (12:16)

(12:17) OMG SORRY JONAS TOOK MY PHONE

(12:17) FUCK

I’m laughing so hard right now (12:17)

(12:18) wanna know what else is hard?

Oh God you have to stop (12:18)

(12:18) what? i was gonna say my biology exam that i failed

Right. (12:19)

(12:19) perv

You like it (12:19)

(12:20) are u flirting with me?

No? (12:20)

(12:21) ok

* * *

Later that week Even asked Mikael to meet him at Starbucks after school. He just needed to talk about some things with his best friend, nothing too serious.

“So, what’s so important that I have to be here with you instead of playing Fifa?” Mikael asked before taking a seat in front of Even.

“Um, it’s not really important I just wanted to talk to you about something.” Mikael looks at him expectantly and Even sighs. “About Isak.”

Mikael's face lit up. “Why am I not surprised. Spill.”

“Okay so like, I don’t know how to do this without having you making fun of me, but I think I like him? I mean, as more than a friend. _Shit_ it’s so stupid since when do I even have crushes. Help meee,” Even pleaded.

“You like Isak as more than a friend? What a plot twist, I love it. When's the wedding?” Mikael asked and Even was really surprised to see that his best friend wasn't making fun of him.

“Mikael. I don't even know if he likes me back. And I can't ask him because one, I wouldn't have the guts, and two, there's one hundred percent chance that he will run away and never speak to me again. I don't want that to happen,” Even said.

“Well, you won't know until you ask him. And if he runs away that means he doesn't like you back which mean he doesn't deserve you. How much do you like him?" Mikael asked.

Even spaced out and thought about the golden boy, about how his smile could light up a thousand universes, about how his eyes made his heart beat ten times faster, and about how his laugh actually make his heart stop. Mikael gave him a look and Even just shrugged, returning to reality. “I don’t know. It’s just a crush, I’m just so happy when he’s around and I’m so happy when he smiles and I’m so happy when he laughs and I’m so happy when I hug him, but I don’t think I’m ready for something serious. What am I talking about, he doesn’t even like me anyway.”

Mikael kicked his foot under the table. “Dude stop saying that. The boy is literally drawling over you. I think your math are wrong, I think there's one hundred percent chance he likes you back.”

“But he isn't gay,” Even said, even though somewhere in the back of his mind he hoped that wasn't true.

Mikael sighed in exasperation. “How would you know? Did he tell you he was straight? Because if he did he’s the worst liar I’ve ever seen. Oh my God Even you’re so oblivious, call me when you two are dating, right now I have a playstation waiting for me.”

Mikael stood up and left the Starbucks before Even even had time to say a thing. He didn’t know what to think so he decided not to overthink the situation and just went home. He’ll just have to wait until Friday and confront Isak.

* * *

**Mikael**

(17:09) Sorry for leaving you but honestly you don’t have to worry about Isak

(17:09) He likes you

(17:10) Trust me

* * *

Friday came faster than Even would have imagined. His parents were getting ready for their weekend away from the house and Even was starting to get impatient. The sooner his parents would left, the sooner the party would begin, therefore the sooner he would see Isak.

He gave up on trying to convince himself that he wasn’t crushing on him. It was obvious, Even spent all his classes thinking about him, he fell asleep at night thinking about him, and every time he would see him at school, talking with Jonas or Eva, he would smile widely, as if he'd just seen the most beautiful thing on earth.

Sometimes he would think Isak actually liked him back, which would explain Sana, Eskild, and even Mikael's comportment, but then he would remember Isak telling him he's straight and would let out his longest sigh ever.

Even's mom appeared in his bedroom where he was sprawled on the bed, deep in his thoughts, and she cleared his throat to make him aware of her presence. "We're leaving. Don't set the house on fire. And please, don't have sex in our bedroom."

"I'm not going to have sex, Mama," said Even, not even in the slightest surprised that she said this.

"I'm not sure Isak is thinking the same. Anyways, we'll be back tomorrow night, call me if anything happen okay?"

"Mooom, I'm 19, I'm not a baby anymore," Even whined, making him look even more like a baby but he didn’t care.

"Oh Even, you'll always be my baby. Have fun, I love you."

"I love you too," he said as his mom was leaving his room only after throwing a condom on his bed. Even rolled his eyes but put it on his nightstand, just in case.

He heard the front door shut and the house fall silent, and suddenly he was out of his bed and up on his feet. Mikael could arrive any minute now, everyone could arrive any minute now, Isak could arrive any minutes now, and Even couldn’t wait until the party starts so he can finally see him.

He’s so whipped.

 _Fuck_.

A few minutes later Mikael showed up at the door with Martin and Jakob, and some groups of teenagers were following, and soon his silent house was full of drunk teenagers dancing to shitty music. (Mikael was in charge of the playlist but he was more interested in flirting with girls.)

Even didn’t see Isak arrive but he was there, at the other side of the room, talking with Jonas, Madhi and Magnus. Even was staring at him and he wanted to go talk to him so bad but he was stuck with this first year who didn’t seem to want to let go of him.

Even didn’t even know what she was talking about, she was just talking really fast, moving her hands with too much enthusiasm, and it was annoying. He was wondering if she would ever stop talking, considering he was just humming to what she said without listening, he wasn’t even looking at her, but she didn’t stop so he just left, pretending he needed a drink.

He headed to the kitchen where he bumped into someone, making them fall to the ground. It was Isak. Who else. Damn, this kid really can’t stand on his feet.

“You have to stop falling for me,” Even said with a smirk, sticking his hand out to help Isak get back on his feet.

“If only I could.” It was only a murmur but Even heard it, and it made his heart beat faster. Isak was now back on his feet and they were standing only a few feet away from each other, Even’s hand still holding Isak’s.

“What?” Even asked.

“What?” Isak asked back with pink cheeks.

“You’re so cute,” Even said in a low voice but he was sure Isak heard it because his cheeks were suddenly very flushed.

“You can’t say that.” Isak whispered, squeezing his hand and looking at his feet.

Even raised an eyebrows. “Oh so you can talk about jerking off and coming and your dick being hard but I can’t say you’re cute?”

“Exactly.”

“Well I don’t care. You’re cute.”

Isak’s face was truly red by now and he was smiling and looking at their fingers intertwined in between them but then he looked up and his gaze focused on something behind Even and he wasn’t smiling anymore. “Hot chick coming your way, good luck.” And just like that he was gone. Even’s hand was empty and it felt like his heart was too.

Even turned around to face this girl from earlier, he didn’t even catch her name because he wasn’t interested in anything she had to say. But she was there, smiling, and Isak was looking at them from the couch now, frowning.

“You were taking a long time to come back, I was wondering if you had found another girl and forgot about me,” the girl said.

“Um no…,” he lied, well he didn't find another girl, but he found a boy. A boy who was looking at them right now and who didn’t seem happy. _Shit_ , is she his crush?

“Good,” the girl said, smiling, and Even didn’t see it coming but seconds later her lips were on his. And it didn’t feel right at all. Especially not when the boy he wanted to kiss was still watching him. Even pushed back as soon as he understood what was happening and when he looked at the couch again, Isak was gone. _Shit_.

“Um, I’m sorry, I’m not interested in you I’m really sorry-- shit.” Even left her and ran around his house, looking for Isak. He finally found him five minutes later in the bathroom, sitting against the wall with his knees pressed against his chest. Even closed the bathroom door behind him and sat beside Isak, who wasn’t looking at him.

“Are you okay?” Even asked, trying to get Isak’s attention.

“I’m fine,” Isak spat, still not looking at him.

“You’re drunk,” Even remarked.

“I’m not. Maybe I am. Why would you care. You should go back to Emma.” Oh so that’s her name. Emma. “You know,” Isak continued, “every time I think I don’t actually hate you you do something stupid that makes me hate you more.”

Isak looked up and Even could see pain in his eyes. He wouldn’t be surprised to know he had be crying. “ _Shit_ , I’m so sorry. I-- She kissed me, I didn’t see it coming. I didn’t kiss back, I swear. _Fuck_ , Isak I didn’t know you liked her, I’m sorry.”

Isak laughed. A small laugh, but it did and it made Even smile. “I don’t like her, Even.”

Even tilted his head, confused. “What? Why are you angry, then?”

“Because…” Isak stopped and planted his eyes into Even’s. “Why kiss her when you could have kissed me?”

Even’s heart stopped beating. “You don’t mean that. You’re drunk. You’re straight,” he said in a strangled voice. He really hoped it wasn’t the alcohol talking instead of Isak, but he knew there was 99% chance it was.

“I mean it. Yes I’m drunk but whatever. No I’m not straight. How could you even think that when I’ve been literally eye-fucking you all night?” Even’s heart started beating again but it was beating way faster and way louder than it should.

“ _Fuck_. I want to kiss you so bad,” Even said, and he realized he said it out loud when Isak’s small smile turned into a smirk and he put his hand on his knee.

“Do it.” Isak was leaning in and he looked so adorable but so hot at the same time and Even was melting but he couldn’t. He couldn't kiss him.

“I can’t,” Even said half-heartedly, without breaking the eye contact. “Not like that, not when you’re drunk and won’t remember it in the morning.”

Some The Weeknd’s song was playing in the living room, Mikael had certainly given up flirting with girls to take back control over the playlist. Even scooted closer to Isak and he ran his fingers over the boy's lips.

“Don’t do that if you’re not gonna kiss me,” Isak whined against his fingers, sounding frustrated.

Even took advantage of Isak talking to shove gently his thumb in his mouth and groaned when he felt Isak’s tongue against his thumb. _What was he doing?_

“ _Fuck_.” Even sighed at the sight of Isak like this and then removed his thumb from his mouth because he couldn’t take it anymore. “Do you see what you’re doing to me?”

“Yeah I can see…" Isak said with a smirk. "You’re hard.”

“No I’m not!” Even protested.

_He was._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi I'm late I'm sorry I've been kind of dead these last three days   
> ANYWAYS let me know what you thought about all this mess and be ready for the two chapters left because a lot happens! I hope y'all are enjoying your holidays :)  
> You can find me on twitter @bluesterek


	5. but what will we do when we sober.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (there's a lot of texting)  
> (drunk!isak is back)

When Even woke up the next day, he was in his bed, in his room, alone. He had made sure Isak got home alive, and then began to clean the house, trying not to think about everything that had happened. It was hard to leave Isak after the things he told him in the bathroom, after the things he _did_ to him in the bathroom, but he knew he had to, or else he would just jump on the boy and kiss desperately. That wouldn't be an issue, the issue would be that Isak wouldn't remember any of it in the morning. And Even really didn't want their first kiss to go that way.

Isak wasn't being cooperative when Eskild showed up and tried to get him in his car, he kept talking and tugging at Even's sleeve, saying things he would probably regret if only he remembered them, but they finally got him in the car and twenty minutes later, when Even was in his pajama, in his bed, he received a text from Isak, a thumb up emoji, although Eskild was probably the one who sent it.

Even didn't know what to do, it was the weekend, he had no homework, the house was clean and his parents were out. He thought of calling Isak, or just stopping by his place, but he knew the boy was probably sleeping his hangover away. He stayed in his bed, looking at the ceiling, waiting for a text, a call, something, anything, just to be sure last night really happened, he didn't imagine any of it. But when the sun was making his way down and Even was still in his bed and his phone had been silent all day, he concluded Isak had just been drunk and he didn't really mean anything he had said.

He fell back asleep that night, thinking Isak would be back at hating him when he'll see him at school on Monday.

***

Even had spent his weekend trying to forget the party, trying to forget the way Isak had looked at him, the way he had smiled at him, but he clearly failed. When he got back to school on Monday, the first thing he noticed was the way Isak's ass looked good in his Jeans. But then he looked up and his smile looked even better. He didn't know if he should go talk to him or walk past him, as if nothing had happened, but before he had time to make up his mind, Isak was walking in his direction and Even was clearly not freaking out. He was _not_. Okay he was.

"Hi!" Isak smiled widely at him and Even didn't really know what to do.

"Hello. I waited all weekend for you to text, but you never did." The younger boy frowned a little and Even freaked out a _little_ more, hoping he didn't cross any line.

"You didn't text either."

"I- I didn't know if it was okay, sorry." Even looked down at his feet, _shit_ why was he being shy, he is never shy, certainly not around Isak.

"Why wouldn't it be okay? We're friends, friends text each other, right?" Isak asked quietly.

"Yeah--"

"Good, so I started watching _The Get Down_ yesterday, and holy shit it's so good I love it! The songs are incredible and the characters are great, and oh my god Jaden Smith is so beautiful."

Even watch the boy in front of him in awe, he was so cute. Friends aren't supposed to find each other cute, but what the hell right, Isak is cute, especially when he is rambling and being his dorky self.

"Isak, you can't just say a boy is beautiful," Even stated, shaking his head even though he was obviously smiling.

"Why not? He is. You are too. Anyway, I have to go to class, see you around. And text me, that's what phones are made for!"

And just like that, he was gone, and Even was left speechless, again.

He made his way to class but not before bumping into Sana, who smirked when she spotted him.

"Sooo I heard some things," she said, wiggling her eyebrows.

Even sighed. "You're gonna have to be more precise than that, Sana."

"I heard you and Isak almost kissed." Even stopped breathing for a second. How could she know?

"No we didn't! He doesn't even remember it so don't ever mention it again, we're trying to be friends."

"Yeah, right. If you like each other why aren't you dating yet?" Sana sounded so sure of herself, almost as if she knew both side of the story, but Even being his oblivious self, he shrugged.

"He doesn't like me."

"Okay, whatever you say, go to class before you get suspended for being late so often, and come find me when you're done being stupid," Sana said before walking away.

When Even reached his classroom, he was late, out of breath, and all eyes were on him. The teacher told him it was the third times he was late in his class, and he hoped there wouldn't be a fourth time because he was a good student, right Even? And he didn't want him to go down in his estimation so just sit down and listen to the class thank you very much. That's what he did, he sat down, and listened. He listened until the words escaping his teacher's mouth didn't make sense anymore because he was half listening, and half thinking about a boy. A boy who made his phone vibrate in his pocket and Even couldn't help but reach out and read what the texts said.

* * *

**Isak**

(09:16) not to sound desperate but

(09:16) do you actually know how to use a phone?

Of course I do (09:17)

(09:17) well fucking text me then

Wow Isak, you're great at not sounding desperate (09:17)

(09:18) piss off

Sorry, I'm in class (09:18)

(09:18) so am i

(09:19) but i'm bored

(09:24) even

(09:30) why are you so bad at texting

(09:33) did the teacher take your phone?

(09:33) omg he totally did

(09:33) HELLO Andersen did you know Even finds you, i quote, "so fucking hot"?

(09:34) he really does

I hate you so much (09:55)

(09:56) hahahaha did he really take your phone??

YES. (09:56)

(09:56) i'm laughing so hard oh god did he see the text?

I don't think so (09:57)

But either way I'm going to kill you (09:57)

(09:58) can't wait

* * *

Even got his phone back at the end of the class and got out before the teacher could give him a lecture he clearly didn't want to listen to right now. He tried to find Isak all morning, whenever he got out of class he would search for him in the hallways, but he was nowhere to be seen.

It wasn't until lunch time that he saw him. Even was sitting at his usual spot with Mikael, Jakob and Martin, the four of them were having a really interesting conversation about video games, until Even spotted Isak a few tables ahead and lost all interest in the conversation.

Isak was talking to Jonas, but then he looked up and his eyes found Even's. Even hold his gaze a few seconds until Mikael kicked his foot and brought him back to reality.

"Bro, are you even listening to us?"

"Of course!" Even said, even though it was obvious he wasn't.

"Yeah? So what was Martin saying?" Mikael asked him.

Even tried to think of what they were talking about when he dazed off but he couldn't remember. "Uh, that he'll kick your ass at Fifa next time we'll play together because you suck at it that even a little girl will win against you."

Martin scoffed. "Even though that wasn't what I was saying, he's not wrong Mikael. You're so bad at it it's embarrassing."

"NOT my point, my point is Even stop fucking staring at the boy, it's becoming creepy," Mikael said in exasperation.

"Whatever." Even flipped him off.

When Mikael was finally off his back, Even looked back at Isak. He was still talking to Jonas, smiling, and laughing, and talking loudly, and God how dare he be so cute. He really tried to keep his eyes away from the boy, but it was hard when Isak was being a dork a few meters away from him. Even kept looking at Isak, and Isak kept looking back. Even only looked away from him when his phone vibrated in his hand.

* * *

**Isak**

(12:12) stop staring

I'm not staring at you (12:12)

(12:13) no?

No, I'm staring at Jonas (12:13)

(12:14) of course

He's really cute (12:14)

(12:14) he says you're not too bad yourself

Tell him I love his hair (12:15)

(12:16) sure do u want me to set you two up too?

Actually that would be great (12:16)

(12:17) that was sarcasm

You're being mean Isak (12:17)

I guess I'll have to ask Jonas myself then (12:17)

(12:17) go ahead

(12:20) i'm waiting

(12:25) chickened out?

Nah, he's handsome but not my type (12:27)

(12:27) ah

(12:27) what's your type then?

Blonde (12:28)

(12:28) that's vague

* * *

When he looked up from his phone, he found Isak's gaze and he was smiling. At him. He sighed and locked his phone, trying to get back into the boy's conversation even though his brain wasn't really being cooperative right now.

***

They texted all week, Even was always in his phone and when he wasn't he was still thinking about Isak. Sana was making fun of him, telling him how whipped he was, Mikael told him he was desperate, and his parents would take his phone away when they were together because Even didn't talk to them anymore.

When they bumped into each other at school, Isak talked about _The Get Down_ , and how he was almost at the end at the show and he didn't want it to end forever, and Even just listened to him fondly.

Neither of them ever mentioned what happened at the party last Friday, they never talked about it and Even tried to forget what even happened. _He failed_.

* * *

**Isak**

(23:54) i finished tgd

(23:54) so like

(23:54) is shao gay and in love with zeke?

We'll never know (23:55)

(23:55) but he's being so obvious

(23:55) like he hates mylene so much

(23:55) and he's always protecting zeke

(23:56) WHAT HAPPENS TO DIZZEE?

We'll never know either (23:56)

(23:56) UGH

(23:56) i hate you

(23:57) i'm sad

Aw babe don't be sad (23:57)

(23:58) babe

(23:58) bABE

(23:58) even

(23:59) you can't call me babe

Why not? (23:59)

(23:59) friends don't call each other babe

I do (00:00)

(00:00) you suck

* * *

Isaaaak (18:25)

(18:31) yes?

You didn't text me in two days (18:31)

(18:31) i was waiting for you to text first

(18:32) wanted to make sure you knew how to do it

(18:32) and you know how

(18:32) so cONGRATS YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN SOMEDAY

Are you telling me we didn't talk in two days because you wanted me to text first? (18:33)

(18:33) yes

You're a little shit (18:34)

I thought you got bored of me (18:34)

(18:35) well i did but you know

Fuck you (18:36)

(18:36) that's my line

* * *

GOODMORNING ISAK HOW ARE YOU DOING IN THIS BEAUTIFUL DAY? (14:27)

(14:27) even

(14:28) it's 2pm

(14:28) it's raining

(14:28) and i'm like two tables away from you

But I texted first!! (14:29)

(14:29) ur the worst

Now I'm hurt. (14:30)

(14:30) aw babe I'm sorry hi i'm fine thank you how are you?

you called me babe (14:31)

i'm fine :) (14:31)

(14:32) where did the capital letters go?

gone (14:32)

with my wig (14:32)

It was Friday night, Even was in his bed, watching Romeo and Juliet on his laptop for the 100th time. His friend, including Isak, were at a party at Jonas' place, and Isak asked Even to come with him but he wasn't feeling so well and decided to stay at home for the night. He didn't know how a small body like Isak's could handle going out and getting drunk every Friday night. He thought Isak would be having too much fun to text him, but apparently not.

* * *

**Isak**

(19:29) EVEN

ISAK (19:29)

(19:29) the party is dope you should come

I told you I'm feeling sick (19:30)

(19:30) right

Have fun, don't drink too much (19:30)

(19:31) can't promise u that

(19:54) shit there's emma

(19:54) i think she wants to kiss me

Well kiss her (19:55)

(19:56) i don't want to

Then don't kiss her (19:56)

(19:56) jonas is expecting me to kiss her bc she's cute

Don't kiss her if it's just to prove something to Jonas (19:57)

 Isak? (20:01)

(21:04) i didnt kiss her

(21:04) i think shes mad

You don't have to kiss anyone at a party (21:05)

You can just have fun (21:05)

(21:05) i want to have fun with u

(21:21) i wish u were here

(22:13) this party is shit withotu u

(22:13) im gonna find more beer

Don't drink too much (22:14)

 Isak? (23:11)

 Just call me if you need a ride home, I'll come get you (23:23)

Have fun :) (23:23)

(01:19) im not having fun

(01:19) i miss u

You'll see me on Monday (01:20)

(01:20) i wanna see u now

(01:21) i cant stop thinknig about last friday

What about it? (01:21)

(01:21) i cant stop thinknig about u

(01:22) i cant stpo thinking about your finger in my mouth

Shit Isak stop talking you're going to regret this tomorrow (01:22)

(01:23) i wont

(01:24) i cant stop thinking about your lips

(01:24) theyre so soft i want to kiss them

(01:25) i want to kiss u

(01:25) fuck

(01:26) im hard

Baby (01:26)

You're drunk and you're talking too much (01:27)

You're going to hate me tomorrow :( (01:27)

(01:28) i told u i wont

(01:28) i could never hate u

(01:28) i like u so much

Isak... (01:29)

(01:29) why dont u like me

(01:30) is it because u like jonas?

(01:30) maybe its his eyebrows

(01:31) i want eyebrosw like him

Your eyebrows are beautiful Isak (01:31)

You are beautiful (01:32)

And I don't like Jonas (01:32)

Now I'm coming to get you and we'll talk about it later okay? (01:33)

(01:34) okay

(01:34) i'll wait for u

(01:39) i'll always wait for u

* * *

Even jumped in his car even though it was really late, or early in the morning, even though his mom was awake, in the doorway and giving him a questioning look, even though he was in pajamas and was still feeling sick, and he drove to Jonas' place. His heart was pounding, his leg was jumping, his brain was dancing, but he reminded himself that Isak was just a flirty drunk and that he was going to hate him in the morning. He didn't want to think about it but it was obvious how this whole situation will turn out. Isak was going to wake up, find their conversation, take in what he said the night before, and hate himself, and hate Even, and they'll never talk to each other again.

He sighed when he parked in front of Jonas' house but got out of his car anyway, he needed to find Isak. He walked into the house and was surprised to find it almost empty. He managed to find Jonas in the bathroom, smoking weed in the bathtub with Madhi and Magnus.

"Even! Buddy! Isak hasn't stopped talking about you all night. He's gonna be so happy to see you," Magnus said when he saw him.

"Yeah about that, do you know, perhaps, where he is?" Even asked, fidgeting.

"He's in my room, he said he'll wait for you there. First room up the stairs." Even thanked Jonas internally for being so useful, on the contrary to Magnus, who seemed pretty stoned right now. He was looking to the ceiling, moving his head in a weird way.

"Thank you so much, don't smoke too much boys, it's not good for your brain."

"Whatever grandpa, go find your boy."

So he did just that. He left the bathroom, making sure to close the door behind him, and run up the stairs. He opened the first door he saw, just like Jonas had said, and he found Isak sitting on the bed, hand on  his laps, waiting patiently for him, apparently. Even walked toward the boy and sit silently beside him. "You okay there?"

"Even!" Isak exclaimed, just noticing his presence. He threw his arms around Even and hugged him tight. The position wasn't comfortable since they were sitting next to each other, but Isak seemed really happy to see him so he let him. "I'm so happy you're here! Emma wanted to kiss me but I didn't want to so she slapped me and called me gay."

" _Shit_ Isak. What did you say to her?" Even took Isak's hand in his and stroke it with his thumb.

"Nothing. She left and I cried in the bathroom and talked to you."

Even frowned. "She can't say things like that just because you didn't want to kiss her! You know this is not okay, right?"

"It's fine, I deserved it, I told her I wanted to kiss you."

Even's breath hitched and he let out a long sigh. He hated Emma so much, he was going to kick her ass when he'll see her at school. But right now he focused on Isak, he stood up and helped Isak to get on his feet too.

"We'll talk about this tomorrow, but right now I'm driving you home, okay?" Isak nodded in his chest, and Even leaded him outside the bedroom, supporting him by an arm around his shoulder. They struggled to walk down the stairs, but they managed to do it and Even was helping Isak in the car now. When he was sure he had his belt on, Even made his way to the driving seat and turned to Isak. He was staring at him with small eyes but he looked cuter than ever.

"Are we going to your place? I want to sleep in your arms. Please," Isak said.

"No, I'm getting you to Eskild, he's worried."

"He's always worried," Isak mumbled.

Even started driving and let out a small laugh, he wasn't wrong. Eskild has been texting him for the last forty minutes, asking when they were coming home. They drove silently, Even almost thought Isak had fallen asleep, but when the car stopped in front of the Kollektiv, Isak turned in his seat and stared at Even.

"You can come with me and sleep in my bed. I won't touch you if that's what you're worried about."

Even shook his head slowly. He was really tempted by the offer, but he knew he couldn't. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not? We'll just sleep," Isak reached to take Even's hand in his, and Even's heart skipped a beat.

"I don't want to be there when you wake up and remember all the things you said tonight," Even said quietly, looking at their linked fingers in front of them.

"What things? That I want to kiss you? That I can't stop thinking about you? I won't regret it. I mean it."

Even squeezed Isak's hand gently. "We'll see tomorrow."

"Can you at least get me in bed? I don't think I'm able to walk the stairs."

"Of course."

Even got out of the car and helped Isak to get out too. Isak tried to stand on his feet but when he almost feel onto the ground, Even lifted him and Isak wrapped his legs around his waist instantly. Even closed the door and entered the building, Isak in his arms. Fortunately for him, Isak was a lightweight. He walked the stairs carefully and when he got in front of Isak's shared apartment, the boy was sleeping on his shoulder. He watched him fondly before knocking quietly at the door. Eskild opened it right away, and he seemed to be about to be his loud self but he saw Isak sleeping on Even's shoulder so he just squealed.

"You two are so cute I'm dying. Is he okay? He's not dead, is he?" It made Even laugh but he stopped himself before he'd wake up the sleeping boy in his arms.

"No Eskild, he's just wasted, I'm getting him in bed and I'll go."

Even crossed the apartment, making sure not to wake up Noora who was sleeping on the couch, and opened Isak's bedroom door. He laid Isak carefully on his bed, forcing him to let go of his neck, and took of his shoes and his hoodie and pulled the cover over him. He watched him sleep and pressed a small kiss on his forehead before leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

Eskild was waiting for him at the front door, in his bathrobe, smirking at him. Why did everyone smirk at him?

"You're a good person Even, I'm so glad you're his friend or whatever you two are."

Even grinned. "I'm glad too."

Later that night-morning-whatever, Even was laying in bed, thinking about Isak. He seemed to be doing this often these days, but this time it was different. This time Even was thinking that maybe it was the last time Isak would talk to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi are you crying? Because I am. Okay so don't hate me too much for that please :( Thank you so much for the kudos and the comments, it's really nice to know that some of you are enjoying reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! One last chapter to go, BE READY.  
> You can find me on twitter @bluesterek


	6. it's time we danced with the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter, but it's also the last, I hope you'll like it!  
> (there's a lot of texting)

**5-7 years old**

_"I love your backpack, I wish my mom would buy me one like yours."_

_"It's pretty cool right? Julian made fun of me because of it but I don't care."_

_"Julian is an idiot. What's your name?"_

_"Even."_

_"Even. I'm Isak."_

They hang out together every day after that. They were inseparable, and even their parents started to be friends. Isak would spend the night at Even's when his mother wasn't feeling well, he would sleep in his bed and Even would reassure him, saying his mom would be just fine.

 

**6-8 years old**

_"Isak! I looked for you all week but you weren't there."_

_"Sorry. I was sick. But I'm here now."_

_"Julian made fun of me because I was alone at lunch."_

_"Julian is jealous because you have a cool backpack."_

_"You think?"_

_"Yeah. I'm jealous too."_

_"I can lend it to you sometime."_

They switched their backpack every morning after that. Isak would walk around the playground with the Spiderman backpack on his shoulder. He would give it back to Even just before his mom would pick him up. Sometimes he would forget and just go home with it, hoping his mother wouldn't ask about it. She never did.

 

**7-9 years old**

_"Happy birthday Even! You're so old. I look so small next to you."_

_"Yeah but that way I can protect you. I can be your bodyguard."_

_"I don't need to be protected. I'm strong!"_

_"Of course you are. Doesn't mean you have to be strong all the time though."_

_"Okay but I wanna be your bodyguard too."_

_"Okay."_

Even was always looking after Isak after that. He protected him from stupid kids that were making fun of him for having long hair. He protected him when older kids wanted to hurt him. He took care of him when Isak's mom had another break down and wrapped his arms around his small body in the bed, telling him that everything will be alright.

 

**8-10y ears old**

_"Even? What do you wanna be when you grow up?"_

_"I don't know. I think I want to direct movies and stuff."_

_"Like Baz Lurnan?"_

_"Baz Luhrmann. Yes. You remember him?"_

_"Of course, you always talk about him. But then you'll become famous and you'll forget him."_

_"Isak. I'll never forget you."_

Even made him watch Romeo and Juliet after that. They were still so young that they didn't understand everything, Even's mom was worried it might scare Isak, but they watched it on the couch, Isak curled up in Even's chest, and nothing could scare him when he was like that. Isak fell asleep on Even before the end of the film.

 

**9-11 years old**

_"Why do you keep growing up while I'm still so small?"_

_"Because you're young. And I'm old."_

_"Yeah you're like a grandpa. Are you going to ditch me to hang out with girls now that you're 11?"_

_"Nah, girls are boring. I'd rather hang out with you."_

_"Not even Sonja?"_

_"I don't like Sonja. I like you."_

Even stopped paying attention to girls after that. Sonja was pretty, she was nice and she seemed to like him. But Even would push her away every time she would try to talk to him, and he would go play with Isak instead. Isak was more fun, more cool, more everything.

 

**10-12 years old**

_"I hate you. Why did you kiss Lea?"_

_"Because she's pretty."_

_"But you said girls are boring and you'd rather hang out with me."_

_"I can hang out with you and kiss girls."_

_"You can't kiss girls that I like!"_

_"_ Shit _you liked her? Why didn't you tell me?"_

_"I hate you. I don't want to be your friend anymore."_

Even tried everything to make Isak forgive him after that. But he was avoiding him and ignoring him. He didn't even like Lea, and the kiss wasn't even that good. He wanted to tell Isak that, but he refused to talk to him. Even hoped Isak would show up at his house one day, because his mother was having another break down and he needed Even to tell him everything would be alright, but he never did. He hoped everything was alright.

 

**11-13 years old**

_"Isak."_

_"Leave me alone."_

_"Okay."_

Even tried to give Isak his space after that. He tried to avoid him in the hallways, tried to get to class before him, tried to sit far away from him at lunch. But he was always there somewhere. And if he wasn't in the room, he was on Even's mind.

 

**12-14 years old**

_"Why are you always in my way?"_

_"Well sorry but you'll be happy to hear our lockers are next to each other, so like, we kind of have to bump into each other every day."_

_"Can't you just find another locker? I'm tired of seeing your face every morning."_

_"You're ridiculous."_

Even stopped bumping into him every morning after that. Isak had decided to share a locker with Jonas.

 

**13-15 years old**

_"I heard you made new friends."_

_"Yes Even, I have friends. So what? Are you sad because you don't?"_

_"I have friends."_

_"You're friends with Julian the biggest asshole in the school who, might I remind you, was the one bullying you when we were little."_

_"It was ages ago. He's nice."_

Even stopped being friends with Julian after that. Because Julian wasn't his friend, he was always making fun of him for being so tall, always making fun of him for having a deep voice. Even started talking to people in his class, people who was nice to him, but never the way Isak had once been nice to him.

 

**14-16 years old**

_"I want to punch you so bad."_

_"You'll break your fist instead of my nose."_

_"Wanna figure it out?"_

_"No thanks."_

They got in a fight after that. Isak punched Even. Even nose was broken, but Isak's fist was fine.

 

**15-17 years old**

_"Is that your girlfriend? Oh my god is that Sonja? From when we were kids?"_

_"Shut up and watch the movie, Isak."_

_"Why did you have to go to THIS theatre? Why did you have to go watch THIS film."_

_"It's a Baz Luhrmann movie, of course I was going to see it. You're the one who have nothing to do here."_

_"Sara likes Baz Luhrmann."_

_"Is she your girlfriend?"_

_"Yes."_

Even heard Isak broke up with Sara a week after that. And Even broke up with Sonja two weeks later.

 

**16-18 years old**

_"So, did Sonja found out how much of a loser you are or what?"_

_"I was the one who broke up with her."_

_"Cool. She was too pretty to be with you anyway."_

_"Maybe."_

Even had a major episode after that. Sonja kept begging him to accept her help, but he didn't want it. He didn't want anyone's help. He just wanted his childhood friend back. He never said anything though. He knew his mom had told Isak about his bipolar disorder, but he didn't want Isak to come back just by pity or guilt or whatever. They just stayed away from each other like they had done for six years. Even eventually got better, but his mind kept screaming at him to apologize to Isak because he needed him. He never did.

***

Even stayed in bed on Saturday. His mom was worried he was having an episode, but Even promised her he was just feeling sad because of something that happened at school. Nothing big. It was the truth. Even was just sad and mad at himself because he hadn't heard about Isak since last night and he knew Isak had block his number and he would be back to avoiding him at school on Monday.

So when he woke up on Sunday with a text from Isak, his heart stopped beating for a second. He closed his eyes, but when he opened them again, the notification was still there. Isak had texted him. Even was anxious to open it. He didn't know what to expect. Maybe Isak would just act like nothing happened Friday. Or maybe he just sent him a message to warn him that he had blocked his number.

Even took a deep breath and opened the text.

* * *

**Isak**

(06:59) hi

Hey (09:45)

How are you (09:45)

(09:46) um

(09:46) fine

(09:46) shit

What's up? (09:47)

(09:48) nothing much

Slept well? (09:48)

(09:49) yea

(09:52) fuck even i can't do this

(09:52) we need to talk

Okay (09:55)

* * *

Even waited. He waited all morning for Isak to text back. To tell him he didn't mean any of the things he had said. But nothing came. He stared at his phone for two hours until he told himself that Isak had probably burned his phone. He pulled the cover over his head and fell asleep.

It was an hour later that his mom pushed his door open and pulled his cover down. She stared at him for a long time until she spoke. "Isak is waiting for you at the door, you should get out of bed before he runs away."

Even stared at her with wide eyes, trying to process what she had just said. Isak? At the door? _Shit_. He got out of bed and pulled a shirt on before throwing a last look at his mom.

"I'll be in my room if you need anything," she simply said.

Even was now looking at the front door. Isak was behind it. He could feel it. He was here, and he wanted to talk to him. _Fuck_. Even took a deep breath and opened the door, revealing the young boy on the porch, looking nervous as hell. Isak was looking at his feet but he looked up and their eyes met. They stared at each other for the longest time. Isak then looked away, and when their eyes locked again, Isak was stepping in the house, and Even couldn't move. Isak was dangerously close to him and the next thing he knew, Isak's lips were on his and one of Isak's hand made its way to his hair while the other gripped his waist.

Isak's lips were so soft, brushing against his, it was the best thing ever, and when Even started to kiss back, he never wanted to stop. The kiss was innocent and slow at first. Just lips on lips. But then Isak's teeth bit down his bottom lip and Even let out a small moan, parting his lips in the process, just enough for the younger boy to shove his tongue in instantly. Isak's tongue explored Even's mouth and Even was overwhelmed and _hot_. He couldn't think, he couldn't move, he couldn't breathe. This was too much, but not enough at the same time. Isak was kissing him like his life depended on it. Maybe it did.

His heart was beating too fast and he could feel Isak's beating just as fast, and it made him so happy. Isak broke the kiss because they were both smiling so much that it was hard to make out properly.

"Um. Hi," Isak said, out of breath.

"Hi."

"So, uh. Can we talk?" Isak asked, looking nervous, even though he was smiling as much as Even was.

Right. _Talk_.

"Yeah, of course. Um let me just-" Even closed the front door because, yeah, they had just made out in front of everyone in the streets, and then leaded him to his bedroom. He sat on the edge of his bed and Isak sat in front of him.

"So that was... Interesting," Isak said, looking at his hands.

"I don't really understand. I mean, the kiss was great, _fuck_ , the best I ever had but uh, I thought you were straight?" Even asked.

"Yeah, and my uncle is Donald Trump," Isak replied, chuckling, but still looking at his hands in his lap.

Even gasped. "What?"

"I’m gay, Even." That's when Isak lifted his gaze and his eyes found Even's blue ones. "And I like you. _Fuck_ , I’ve liked you since you walked in the classroom the first day of school with your Spiderman backpack. I thought you would’ve got it by now. Especially after I told you I wanted to kiss you."

"But the only times you said it you were drunk. And you punched me when I asked you if you were gay," Even argued.

Isak smiled fell into a frown as if he had forgot it had happened. "Oh. Yeah. Sorry about that, I'm not really out, I thought you were making fun of me or some shit."

"You're not out?" Even asked.

"I'm half out half in the closet? I don't know. Jonas, Madhi Magnus and the girls figured out I liked you, which lead them to figure out I was gay, but like, I'm not out to the whole school. I'm not out to my mom," Isak said the last part quietly.

"It's okay, not everyone needs to know that you like boys." Even took Isak's hand in his and laced their fingers. It was the most delicate touch ever, but it made Even's brain dance the way it used to do every time Isak was around.

"But she's my mom. I think she deserves to know. But I'm scare of how she'll react. I haven't really talked to her or my father in a long time."

"It's okay, you have time. It doesn't have to be now," Even whispered. They laid next to each other in bed and listened to each other's heartbeat for a while. They didn't talk, they didn't move, they just stared at each other and smiled fondly. Then they kissed. Soft and innocent, but it made Even want to scream. Their right hands were still intertwined and Even's left one made its way into Isak's hair. It was soft. So soft.

"So, why was the girl I kissed your crush if you've liked me since we were little?" Even asked after what felt like an eternity, taking Isak by surprise. He changed his position so that he was sat on the bed now, looking down at Even.

"Uh."

Even chuckled. "Isak. Are you saying you hated me for ten years because I kissed a girl instead of you?"

"No? Yeah? Maybe. I didn't hate you, I just thought it wasn't normal to think about a boy the way I thought about you," Isak said so seriously that Even felt guilty for laughing at him.

"You could've just told me and I would've shown you there's nothing wrong about two boys kissing each other. We would've been together since that day."

"It doesn't matter, we got there anyway, didn't we?" Isak asked, half shy half teasing.

"I don't know, are we together?" Even teased back.

"I don't know, do you want us to be together?"

"No." Even said, smiling widely.

"I hate you so much," Isak groaned and it made Even chuckle.

"We both know that's not true. But I don't know, do you think you'll be able to handle me, you know, when I'm down. I haven't had an episode since we started talking again, but whether it's tomorrow or in two months, it's going to happen again sometime in the future and I don't want you to see me like that."

"It's okay, we'll take it one day at a time. I want you, all of you, the good and the bad. I want to be there for you the way you were there for me when my mom wasn't well." Even wasn't looking at him, his gaze was focused on a spot behind him.

"I want it too but I don't know if this is a good idea. I didn't work out with Sonja."

"Just because you're sick doesn't mean you can't love. Let me prove you that," Isak ran a hand on Even's cheek and Even melted. He _melted_. What the fuck.

"Okay."

"Okay?" Isak kissed him. It lasted a second but it made Even smile.

"Yeah. My mom is going to freak out. I bet she's listening at the door right now."

"No I'm not!" His mom said from behind the door, where she was obviously listening their conversation. Even and Isak laughed at that. "Okay I was but I just wanted to make sure you didn't kill each other. But I'm going now, don't have sex while your father and I are in the house please."

"Mama!" Isak was dying of laughter beside him and it was clearly the cutest thing he had ever seen in his life.

_I like you so much._

They laid in bed all day, Isak cuddled up against Even's chest, they talked, they laughed, they kissed, they slept, and whatever they were doing, Even was happy. He missed this. He missed being friends with Isak. Well, they were more than friends now, but he just really missed being around Isak.

When the sun was down, Isak decided it was time for him to go home. He left Even after covering all his face with kisses, and Even just stared at the ceiling for an hour after Isak was gone, smiling like a fool.

***

On Monday Even went up to Sana, he planned on telling her what had happened during the weekend, and when he was standing in front of her, she was smirking. Again.

"Hi Even!" She said, looking way to happy to not be complotting something.

"Uh, hey, I have to tell you something."

"Let me guess," she tapped her chin, pretending to be thinking deeply, then her face lit up "oh yeah! You and Isak got together."

Even gaped at her. "What the fuck. Did he tell you?"

"Of course he told me, Even. It was about damn time, he hasn't stopped talking to me about how ridiculously hot you were for a year now," She said, rolling her eyes even though she was smiling.

"What the hell? A year? Is this why you wanted me to talk to him. _Shit_ this is why you always seemed to know everything! This is why you were convinced he really was a good guy."

"It took you long enough to find out. But I'm happy for you two." She hugged him and it surprised Even, because he never took Sana for a touchy kind of girl, but he hugged her back. He was happy too.

***

He really thought telling Mikael and the guys would be another story. But when he showed up at their table at lunch and sat silently before saying "Isak and I are dating", Mikael hugged him and then patted his shoulder. Mikael knew about his little crush since he asked him for advice, but Jakob and Martin had no idea, and yet they were smiling wide at him.

"Damn bro, that's really cool! He's a nice dude," Jakob said.

"So like, are we gonna have to watch you make out during lunch and every other time of the day or what?" Martin asked.

"Nah, I don't think he's into PDA. Besides he's not really out yet. I don't know."

"Well I'm really happy for you two," Jakob said, giving him a high five.

Mikael nodded his head in agreement. "Yeah bro, told ya hate sex was the best."

Even gasped. "What the fuck Mikael! We didn't have sex!"

"Ah, too bad."

Then just like that, the subject changed and it was like nothing had happened. Like Even hadn't just told his best friends he was dating a _guy_ he had hated and who had hated him back for so many years. His phone vibrated in the pocket of his Jeans and Even knew who was texting him. He took it out and couldn't help but smile.

* * *

**Isak**

(12:13) so

(12:13) i told the guys we were a thing

What did they say? (12:14)

(12:14) jonas wants to meet you properly

(12:14) madhi wants to party with you

(12:15) magnus wants to fuck you but magnus doesn't count

Great! (12:15)

I told the boys too (12:15)

(12:15) aaand?

Jakob said he was happy for us (12:15)

Martin asked if we were going to making out in front of them all the time (12:16)

And Mikael said he had warned me about hate sex (12:16)

I told him we hadn't had sex (12:17)

(12:17) yet

iSAK (12:18)

(12:18) what

You're supposed to be innocent (12:18)

(12:19) yeah right

(12:19) you're talking to the guy who gets hard just thinking about you

(12:19) the guy who can stop thinking about your fingers

(12:20) remember?

shit (12:20)

Baby (12:21)

That's not fair (12:21)

(12:21) ;)

(12:22) meet me in the men room and i'll take care of u

ISAK WTF (12:23)

WE'RE IN SCHOOL (12:24)

(12:24) okay

(12:25) good luck walking with that

(12:25) see ya

I'm coming (12:27)

(12:28) already?

(12:28) untouched?

(12:28) that's a little sad

I'M COMING TO THE BAThROOM U LITTLE SHIT (12:29)

You better be there I swear (12:29)

 

* * *

Isak was there.

* * *

**Mikael**

(15:16) not into PDA my ass

What? (15:21)

(15:21) do you think i didn't see you heading to the bathroom with a hard on and coming back with nothing?

Piss off (15:21)

(15:22) i like him

Me too (15:22)

* * *

 A week later, on a Tuesday night, Isak knocked at his door. His mom was the one to open the door and let him in because Even was in the shower, but when he walked in the kitchen, his hair still wet from the shower, he found Isak on a chair, his eyes full of tears and his mom hugging him. He gave his mom a questioning look but she just left the kitchen, leaving them alone.

Even kneeled in front of Isak and took his hand in his own. "Isak? What happened?" Isak's eyes found his blue ones and he just stared at him silently for a minute.

"I went to see my mom. I told her about me. About you. About us," he whispered.

"Okay. Okay. What did she say? Is she okay?"

"She was so happy to hear it. I thought she would reject me but she- she hugged me tight and she said that I will always be her son and that she liked you and that she hoped you'll be good to me." Tears were rolling down his cheek, but Even chased them away with his thumb.

"That's great! Why are you crying?"

"I don't know, I was so scared to tell her I guess I'm just relieved. But I also feel guilty because I left her again. She seemed happy today but I know tomorrow will be different and I won't be there." Isak was leaning into his touch but tears were still leaving his eyes.

"Hey baby. Hey. Look at me." Even tilted Isak's chin to meet his eyes. "It's okay, you can go see her more often now. You can go see her whenever you feel like it. I could even come with you if you want."

"Yeah?" When Even saw the sparks in Isak's eyes, he knew he would do anything for this boy. _Anything_.

"Yeah."

"I like you so much," Isak said.

"I like you more," Even responded.

They slept in Even's bed that night. Isak was cuddled up against his chest and they were laying in silence. Even buried his face in his boy's hair and sigh contently into it. They would make it work. He knew it. They just had to take it one day at a time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END.  
> Hi congrats and thank you for making it to the end! I can't believe it's over, I know it's ony 6 chapters long and it took me less than two weeks to write it but it's my first Evak story and I'm so sad that it's over :( Anyways, thank you all for your constant support, thank you for the kudos and the comments, thank you for being patient with me and for sticking around even though my English isn't perfect, and thank you for all the kind words! I'm so happy I had to share this with you izbfesisifb  
> I hope I'll see some of you around if I post another story :)
> 
> find me on twitter @bluesterek


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